There are lots of married women who have to operate as single moms. Their husbands are truckers, salesmen, in the military, or another occupation taking them away from home for long periods of time.
Carla shares her own experiences, her own dashed dreams. She suggests you write a letter to God expressing it all (perhaps burning the letter). Ask God to give you something new. Make sure you are reading your Bible.
She address all the emotions women left to parent alone face: fear, insecurity, jealousy, fatigue, shame, pride, self-pity, and anger.
Carla shares how she began to turn away from her husband emotionally. She decided to leave him but a friend helped her to see how she had been deceived. She vented all her hurt and pain before God. Hope began in her heart. She made a commitment to God but when she shared it with her husband, he was unresponsive. She tells how she ultimately relied on Jesus.
She shares her disappointment with the lack of church support (after all, she was “married”). She relates hot to cultivate friends and supporting connections. She has practical suggestions for caring for her children, disciplining (getting your husband involved), dealing with “husband” chores, taking care of the house, having sit-down family meals, pulling off meaningful celebrations, how to help your children deal with their dad not attending their “big event,” hot to get those much deserved breaks, honoring your husband, dealing with your own physical and emotional needs (while guarding your heart), handling your children's hurting hearts, and accepting your husband back into your life when he is home.
Carla's husband has the last say in the final chapter. He admits, “Men are clueless.” He suggests wives believe in their husband's good will and intentions.
Carla has provided resources to download, such as a journal, at www.carlaanne.com. She has also included an appendix with suggestions for reading and other resources.
Carla is very honest with her struggles, including her physical and emotional faithfulness to a husband absent for long stretches of time. She shares her own battles and strategies for remaining faithful, both in action and in her mind.
The hardest part of this book to read was the section on the hurts kids experience from an absent father.
I live in a naval community and spouses are gone seven or eight months at a time. I talked to wives and know the frustrations they experience while solo parenting. This book is a jewel. What an excellent resource! If you are solo parenting, get this book.
Carla runs the Married Single Mom blog at www.carlaannecoroy.blogspot.com. She speaks regularly and serves as staff writer for an online Christian women's magazine Mentoring Moments for Christian Women. She lives in Canada with her husband and four homeschooled children. For more information, visit www.carlaanne.com.
Kregel Publications, 251 pages.
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I received a copy of this book from the publisher for the purpose of this review.