Haines is a word smith. She uses her creative skills to write a compelling memoir of chasing desires, hoping to fill the hollow in her soul, and ultimately finding fulfillment in true intimacy with God.
She grew up in a Christian environment where there was no openness to discuss pain or despair. “I thought I would never be able to do enough to be accepted by God's people, and therefore by God.” (18) She turned to drugs and sex until, falling flat on her face, she opened her soul to God's fulfilling flow.
Haines gives us an honest account of her marriage, of their relationships to other couples, and the birth of their boys, including the medical issues of their youngest. She writes of wrestling with belief in the midst of joy and disappointment.
She and her husband developed a small group community, trying to live out the truth of being in a broken world, living as broken people. She shares the lessons she learned as she stumbled along in her Christian walk. She found, for example, that repentance is “...the recognition that you chased other desires when you could have had God – your satisfaction – all along.” (173)
Haines has crafted a well written account of her search for satisfaction and true intimacy with God. She is skilled and imaginative in her use of words. At times, her sentences were so poetic I almost lost the meaning behind the words. Those who appreciate the creative and poetic use of words will enjoy this book.
Those who feel like their Christian life is missing something in the hollow of their soul will benefit from reading this book. Haines' honesty is a refreshing account of finding true satisfaction from intimacy with God.
Food for thought: “All I ever want for myself is the kingdom version of me, the exact thing he is making me.” (160-161)
Amber C. Haines is a soulful writer and blogger at TheRunaMuck.com. She is curator, with her husband, Seth, of Mother Letters and is a contributor at DaySpring's (in)courage. She and her husband live in Arkansas with their four sons. Find out more at http://amberchaines.com.
Revell, 208 pages.
I received a complimentary copy of this book from the publisher and through Icon Media for the purpose of an independent and honest review.