Geri spent 17 years trying to be the perfect pastor's wife then decided to quit. “When we quit those things that are damaging to our souls or to the souls of others, we are freed up to choose other ways of being and relating that are rooted in love and lead to life.” (16)
She wants you to have the courage to quit too. Quit being afraid of what others think. Quit lying, even “good” Christian lying (no more facade). Quit dying to the wrong things, depriving yourself of God-given gifts. Quit blaming (and take responsibility for your life). You need to quit everything that does not belong to Jesus' kingdom or fall under his rule.
Geri is convinced you'll need to quit to grow into a spiritually and emotionally mature adult. It might not be popular but there comes a time when you know you will die spiritually or emotionally unless you quit and choose something else.”Biblical quitting is God's path for new things to come forth in our lives, for resurrection.” (21)
Geri wraps up her suggestions with the last chapter, “Quit Living Someone Else's Life.” She shares her discovery: discover your inner integrity, listen to your inner rhythm, set boundaries and let go of others. “As you apply these practices, you will join an adventure with God around the joy of fulfilling your special purpose on earth.” (197)
Geri is very practical in her writing. For example, she writes, “many of us feel guilty saying no.” (127) We might imagine that saying no is less than Christlike. She reminds us that Jesus said no many times. She adds, “We must be able to say no if we are to say a healthy yes.” (128)
I was especially struck by her chapter, Quit Overfunctioning. “We overfunction when we do for others what they can and should do for themselves.” (141) Ouch. And, “I know I am overfunctioning when I think I don't have time to stop and be with God.” (155) Ouch again.
Not every woman will like this book. Geri at one point got a part time job at the local YMCA. It renewed her joy in athletic activity. It also required her pastor husband to pick up the kids from school and be responsible for making dinner a few days a week. Women who feel the wife's place is in the home would not be happy with some of Geri's suggestions.
Geri Scazzero is a popular conference speaker, trainer, and coach for church leaders, women's groups, and married couples. She has served on staff of New Life Fellowship Church in New York City for the last 25 years and is the co-founder, along with her husband, of Emotionally Healthy Spirituality. See more at www.emotionallyhealthy.org.
Zondervan, 224 pages. (Note, this book was previously released in 2010 as I Quit!)
I received a complimentary copy of this book from a publicity group for the purpose of this review. The opinions expressed are my own.